Letter To A Friend About Sexuality
By Reza Ganjavi
We're friends and can talk to each other, so I share some impressions. If it's nonsense you can delete/forget it - or maybe it makes sense - or maybe you don't know and want to explore/find out.
Women peak sexually around age 30 -- the hormones go through amazing changes around age 27 and peak from there.
It's good to distinguish the biological and psychological although they're related since the brain is physical.
An intelligent mind doesn't make conclusions.
Good to be open - be in not knowing -- maybe know the known but be open to the unknown otherwise it prevents change.
Life is about change – growth.
A tree that doesn't grow dies.
A river that doesn't flow stagnates.
Not saying you will or should change - I have no idea - but to be open to change. You're very special - in a good way - very intelligent, creative, good energy, good brain, good genes, so perhaps you reacted to sex having become so superficial and over important and an escape from pain and suffering and misery and unhappiness which most people experience -- it becomes a way of extracting pleasure out of the being as an escape. BUT it doesn't have to be that way, it can be a very creative thing - so at some point if and when that time comes you go with the flow and explore it - e.g. when you're kissing with your friend.
Perhaps the attraction will come - I don't know - but if it does, a conclusion can stop and block something that can be nice, can be enriching, healing, beautiful, and not what the society has made of it - a mechanical act - to get pleasure - based on ego - etc. etc.
There's an element of creativity in human sensual contact that is amazing where it's artistic - animals are just driven by the powerful drive that is there for reproduction - very little foreplay and after play which to me are even more interesting than the intercourse itself.
So it may be that your body at some point wants to go in that direction - in which case it'd be good if you're open to it and not let your mind block the body which may make you thought-centric - mind-dominated - and may prevent you from living a holistic and happy life. I'm not saying sex is necessary for that - no. Sex is not a need. But blocking it is not cool -- I'm not saying that's what you're doing - I have no idea.
It may also be that your energy is in upper chakras -- which is great -- I think that's the case -- but it's also good to have balanced lower chakras.
I'm not making a problem out of it. I went on for years at a time without sex or even masturbation. Body took care of adjusting its waters in sleep every 3 weeks or so. But also I've had amazing time with some high-quality women in bringing amazing notes out of them they didn't even know it exists and vice versa.
Anyway, happy exploration with an open mind. And about love. Here's a good song. https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x6mtbyq. Love is the essence of the universe. The Bible says God is love. Important thing is to wipe that which is not love, then there's love.